As a wife, full-time employee, and mom of twin two-year-old boys, I. Am. Exhausted! I think I’d be exhausted no matter what, but with all that has gone on in 2020, exhaustion has gone to another level- more like depletion. Well, this mom did a thing; I took a solo vacation to Tulum, Mexico. It was the break and ultimate form of self-care that I needed. That’s when I realized that every mom needs to take a solo vacation. In case you need some convincing on why you should do this for yourself or points to support your case, below are five reasons why you should take that solo vacation, mama!
Being a mom is like being a juggler. You’re trying to balance the needs of everyone who lives in your home: cooking, cleaning, planning, educating, entertaining, etc. That leaves very little time for self-prioritization as there is never an extended period of time without anyone’s presence or having to do something for someone else. Taking that solo mom vacation forces you to prioritize yourself. Spend the time doing what you enjoy doing, guilt-free.
While in Tulum, I spent one afternoon eating lunch in bed while watching Matilda on TV. This excitement was followed by the most beautiful nap. Despite all of the adventure and great fun I had while in Tulum, this afternoon was one of the highlights of my trip. It was time to myself to do absolutely nothing.
When your days are filled with taking care of others and meeting obligations, it’s easy to forget about yourself- who you truly are, what brings you joy, what you like to do, etc. Most mama’s can fill in the blank: “Before kids I loved doing _______, now I don’t have the time.” An extended period of alone time on a solo mom vacation gives you the opportunity to do whatever that thing is. You can explore a new city, enjoy the beachfront or mountains, stay in bed reading a book or watching TV, or whatever YOU desire.
Before kids I loved trying something new and different, something that ignites a slight bit of fear as it’s something I’ve never done before. So when I had the opportunity to stay at a hostel for the first time during my solo mom vacation in Tulum, I went for it. I was super nervous as I always thought hostels were for college students and backpackers, of which I am neither. I’m so glad that I gave it a try. It took me out of my comfort zone and I learned about a different way of doing things.
You can get more details on my first hostel experience, here.
Most of the time when someone says “create memories” it’s in reference to memories with someone else. But why don’t we emphasize the importance of creating memories for ourselves, especially for us mamas? Memories sans the husband, kids, or anyone else. Memories of you as a woman, not a mama, not a wife, not something to someone. Just memories of the amazing woman that you are.
While in Tulum I did an underwater photoshoot in a cenote, all by myself. It was such an awesome experience. Of course it would’ve been a great experience with the hubs, but I loved being by myself, getting all of the attention :). Sometimes a mama needs all eyes and support on her.
Refill Your Cup
It’s impossible to refill your cup when you’re always pouring into others. And that’s what us mamas do, we pour into others. But remember, we can’t pour from an empty cup. A solo mama’s trip will give you the opportunity to start replenishing your cup. It allows for no excuses on why you can’t focus on you. Everytime we spend time on ourselves, we refill our cup. An extended period of time to yourself helps to do just that.
Now, I must admit that when I returned home from Tulum it was still a bit of a challenge to get back into adulting. However, the memories that I created in Tulum helped me get through the tough times- cleaning up pee, the 100th time repeating the same thing, and all of the other “fun” moments of motherhood.
Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder
This proverb is so true for me! Sometimes this mama just needs time away- away from my “to do” list, away from the continuous screams of mama, away from the day-in and day-out of responsibilities. Now I must admit that I do miss my husband and kiddos on my solo mom trips, especially when I see other families. But I have to remember that this time is for me so that I can have the energy and mental capacity to love on my family when I return.
Please remember that a solo vacation doesn’t necessarily mean you have to go to a different country or city. It can be as simple as spending a night at a hotel in your city. And if you’re not yet comfortable taking a solo trip, you can always go with a girlfriend or two. But be sure to block out time to be by yourself. In fact, my Tulum trip included meeting a friend who is traveling through Mexico. However, I was sure to get a private room for myself so that I was able to have enough “me” time. Quiet time to yourself is essential for us mamas. So, take that solo trip, sis!